Charlotte’s Web

I’m Drinking:  Busch

I wish I had a Charlotte like that pig did.  Zuckerman’s famous pig.

I haven’t read or seen the story in a long time.  But Wilbur is the name of the pig right?  Zuckerman’s famous pig is Wilbur.

Just to get this out of the way, Wilbur isn’t meant for the butcher.  He is also not meant for the pig milk farm.  Wilbur is immortal.  Wilbur is mine and everyone else’s favorite pet forever.

Who likes Charlotte?  That’s a spider, okay.  Whoever likes Charlotte has some issues.  Spider issues.  I have Charlotte issues.  Growing up my best friend had a sister named Charlotte and we called her Char Char.  She was older than us and I was in love.*

Who likes Wilbur?  If you don’t LOVE Wilbur then you are heartless and have no chance with Charlotte.  (If you don’t have a retort that involves pepper we aren’t interested.)


* Charlotte is still her name.  She is alive and wonderful.  I’m sure if I saw her I would be lost for words.**

** I’m unsure on all of this except one thing…I want a Gamburger with Day Day and uncle Joey in BR.